"But Bedtime Bear doesn't want to go in the bath"
"Can you take the spoons out of the washing machine please, darling?"
"You put her in the bath, and I'll scrub the carpet and wipe the poo off the plastic cash register"
"Well your cucumber is the same as my cucumber"
"Do you want to get out of the washing basket now?"
"Put Mammy's tampons down and play with your caterpillar"
"If you do that to the toilet seat one more time, I will be very cross"
"I don't enjoy man-handling you like this, you know"