Not in a sinister way, I might add. To my knowledge, no-one has ordered a hit on her yet. But you may recall me acknowledging that it was getting more than a little ridiculous to keep referring to her as The Baby, when she is 14 months old, never stays still, is capable of taking her own top off (this is a new one, and quite funny when you are getting her ready for her bath, less so when you are trying to put her pyjamas on afterwards), and eats nearly as much as I do. I decided that she could stay The Baby until she was walking. Which she still isn't, but I suspect it might not be long. We have a Standing Baby! Kind of. She very often doesn't notice she's doing it, having been holding on to something, and then started lifting it up and shaking it about, meaning she is standing unsupported. Woo. Sadly, the minute we notice and start with the praise and adulation, she promptly sits down and refuses to do it anymore. I thought the Perfect Parenting Handbook advocated this kind of loving encouragement? I thought it was supposed to help them develop? Not my contrary little child, obviously. Sometimes, I swear she is looking at me as if to say "Mother, I am not a performing seal. Kindly cease and desist with the gushing. I will do it again in my own sweet time."
Anyway, I must find a new alias for my child. As I am not very original, it is likely to be The Toddler. Although that sounds a bit weird. As if it were the title of a really bad film. Maybe with Vin Diesel in it.
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