Because what the internet needs is more wittering about rubbish parenting

Monday, 8 February 2010


I'm back!

I have had a wonderful time in London, spent a lot of money and eaten some gorgeous food. And of course, spent some quality time with my fantastic little sister. Drinks with her friends did not happen, so I was spared the challenge of trying to conduct appropriate conversations - I can say what I like to my sister, and if I get too boring she tells me I am a loser and need to shut up. But I still have not had my mojito!!!!! It has been over 7 months since the baby was born and I am yet to have a celebratory drink of my favourite cocktail. The world is conspiring against me to make sure I never have one again! (Ok, I may have sabotaged myself a tiny bit, as after having a very late dinner in a very nice but very very slow Morrocan restaurant, my pathetic self was too tired to go out for a drink and just wanted bed!).

It was a great weekend. As you very quickly forget what life before children is like, it was something of a revelation to me that other people:
  • have alcohol anytime after 12pm, just because it's the weekends
  • buy clothes without picturing how they are going to look once covered in porridge
  • stay up past midnight when they don't have work in the morning
  • choose restaurants based on what they want to eat, rather than how much space is in between the tables.

So it was very fun playing at being childless for a couple of days. I missed The Baby a satisfying amount (not so much it made me sad, not so little that I felt like a very Bad Mammy). Through my regular, but not obsessively so, progress reports, I heard that not only had Husband fed, watered and otherwise looked after The Baby, he had also turned into some kind of Wonder Husband and had tidied the house and done two loads of washing. The Baby had apparently been in a very good mood all weekend, so I awoke this morning a very happy mammy, looking forward to spending the day with my gorgeous smiling baby.

However, once breakfast was out of the way (it is rare that she does not smile for porridge), Grumpy Baby came out to play. She whinged when I put her on the couch to play, she whinged when I put her on the floor to play, she whinged when I gave her a cuddle, she whinged when I lay her down for a nap, she whinged when I gave her toys, she whinged when I took them away. In these situations I did what I always do and put her in her cot. If she is going to be a bugger no matter what I do, I may as well take the opportunity to grab a shower!

She must not like me.

I hear awakening noises. Hopefully Happy Baby has returned.

1 comment:

  1. Bless you, in our house it is the other way round, Ben gets grumpy baby :-)
    I wonder if I go away would Ben clean the house? answer is probably not and to top it off it would look worse than when I left.
    Glad you had a good time Bad Mammy